Stress

Everything I hear and see suggests that mothers today are more stressed than ever before. A survey on the Today Show compared whether mothers today have it easier or harder than the last generation of mothers. In many ways, mothers today have it easier, particularly when it comes to hands-on dads, innovative career options, and technological advantages that create new work opportunities, parenting resources, and connections to like-minded parents. The other news from that survey mirrored what mothers say in our mommy & me classes. Some 95% claimed that mothers today are more stressed than their mothers.

Is the world today is more stressful? Maybe. But hardship is not new to this generation. I think ambiguity is. Is the world more violent or is it a different kind of violence? There appears to be more fear and more uncertainty – more things beyond a parent’s control.

Problem is I also know that children need to believe that the adults around them can and will protect them. Children deserve safe childhoods surrounded by loving adults who have time to nurture, teach and enjoy them. In 1999, family/work researcher Ellen Galinsky confirmed that what children want from their parents is time and they “wish” that parents would be less stressed. Children see and feel the stress of living in overdrive.

We must stare down the fear of living in uncertain times. Make a list of everything you can “control” in family life. Start small with age-appropriate routines: bedtimes, family stories, and maybe a media-free night. Create a family life that is insulated from the stress of the external world. Children need to believe their families are safe sanctuaries where they can be themselves and be nurtured.

Childhood used to be a time of innocence. Reclaim it for your child with silliness and laughter. Your child knows the way. All you have to do is make the time to follow. Reclaim a small dose of innocence for yourself. That’s one thing your child is happy to share.