A New Year's Intention instead of a Resolution

Here it comes – 2008 is knocking at the door - and like good parents all across the country you resolve to be a better parent. No more yelling. No more begging and bribing. No more hate-yourself-in-the-morning mistakes. Of course, I want you to grow as a parent. I want you to enjoy your children and savor the joys of raising children. But I also know there is no such thing as a perfect parent.

One of my favorite lines from the Parenting Quick Tips CD is: Perfect parents do not raise perfect children; they raise children who feel not good enough. It’s time to give up that notion of being a perfect parent. It never worked anyway.

Before this New Year gets one second closer, choose instead a new intention that will guide your heart without adding enormous stress to your family life. An intention is a wonderful reminder of where and how you want to focus your energy. It isn’t an attempt to change you – rather, like that old bumper sticker, it lets U B U! It also carries an essential underlying message that you are enough and don’t need to be changed!

Parenting can be an expression of “what you are” instead of “what you think you should be”. When you start the day or when you’re faced with one of those stressful parenting moments, ask yourself: what’s my intention? You also have the freedom change your intention to fit different needs and different situations. If yesterday was extraordinarily busy, your intention today might be to take it slow. If you’re feeling the financially or emotionally depleted after the holidays, you might want to recharge with old friends or in nature.

NASCAR recommends drivers look where they are going – never at the wall! Your car will go where you are looking. Your children will too!