The Power of "NO"

“NO” is your parent-prerogative to make a good choice on behalf of your child. Your child can’t always predict the outcome of his choices – two pieces of cake will give him a tummy ache; postponing bedtime makes him crankier; and toys left around the house get lost. Rules can guide your child to make better choices. Choose rules that fit your child and your family, knowing that different homes have different needs and priorities.

The particular rule doesn’t matter. For example, the rules in my classroom may be different than another teacher’s rules. What matters is that your child learns there are a few reasonable limits on her behavior. She can’t always get what she wants but, with your guidance, she will always get what she needs.

Children need limits until they have the maturity to evaluate all the aspects of a situation. The need limits to learn restraint when they want to lash out in anger or frustration. The need limits to learn how much is enough. They need limits to stop from hurting other people and from destructive actions. Limits create a safety cushion around your child until the time when your child can make independent choices.

Your child is depending on you using your power on his behalf. He believes you know everything and can do anything. Respect the power of being a parent and you will make great choices.

The Entitlement-free Child

Hello Everyone,

Some of you have asked where's the February newsletter. I'm so happy you missed it. But I've been so busy writing the new book, The Entitlement-Free Child, that I didn't send a newsletter last week. I'm half way through the book - good thing because it's due to the publisher May 1st! I'm already planning a new parenting series based on Entitlement-Free for the Fall. I can't wait to share all the new info and strategies with you!..

Here's one of my favorite lines from last week's writing. For the parent who says "I love you" in discipline situations, hoping your child will never question your love...

Your love is deep and ongoing. Of course, your child should participate in daily "love rituals" that create a sense of security and unconditional love. Buuuuut, your child is not a love-munching machine that must be fed incessantly like a broken parking meter. Allow your child to learn to trust you - to trust that you truly act on her behalf.